...one of those bumber stickers that says "God, please protect me from your followers."

Today I looked at the profile of someone who is in a group called "I love Bush, and I'd Blow Up the Middle East in a Heartbeat". In that profile, I saw a quote listed that says "There is nothing wrong with California that a rise in sea level couldn't cure." I have another acquaintance who, when told that it is believed that 4 young gay people suicide every day because they cannot reconcile faith with identity, responded by saying that 4 people "doesn't seem like a high enough number".

My heart hurts. These people, and others who share their beliefs, constantly defend their positions by declaring a constitutional right to free speech. But it is not the right to free speech that concerns me.

"The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For out of the overflow of his heart his mouth speaks." Luke 6:45

It concerns me to know that people are willing to allow these words to be written or spoken. All of these examples call for the deaths of human life.

"If we can't agree on the sanctity of life... where do we go from there?"

I am at a loss for words. I don't even know what to say. My heart is broken to know that people are willing to allow their hearts to feel such hatred... a hatred so strong that it would advocate for mass murders and innocent bloodshed. If the verse in Luke is correct, it saddens me to know that these people have so much evil stored up in their hearts.

I just don't understand where any of this reflects Jesus? Can someone point out Jesus in any of this? I am trying to desperately to leave Christianity with even a drop of understanding... to walk away with something more than pain and hurt. But I cannot see Jesus in what my "brothers and sisters in Christ" are saying and doing.

I see more Jesus in those of my friends who do not even believe in the holiness of that man. Their lives portray an example of him that is so pure... they reach out to the needy. They love those who no one else will love. They create safe spaces for people to express concerns. And they treat every person with respect.

I have seen more of Jesus from outside the walls of Christianity than I can remember seeing in my entire time within those walls.

My heart is broken.